Spiders Are Big Fat Liars
I kill spiders when I see them.
I don't care if there are twenty million spiders behind the walls, or under the stairs, or wherever. As long as they don't come into my normal line of sight, they leave me alone, and I leave them alone.
Those are the terms of the treaty between us.
But unfortunately, some of the spiders are stupid. Or, perhaps they're just lying little sacks of poo, because they disregard the treaty, and wander into my path. When this happens, I have no choice: They have to die.
The cats are with me on this.
If they HAVE to invade unfriendly territory, the wiser move would be to attack en masse. Twenty million spiders all after you at once? They could do it! They just don't work together well.
That's probably for the best, though.
I don't care if there are twenty million spiders behind the walls, or under the stairs, or wherever. As long as they don't come into my normal line of sight, they leave me alone, and I leave them alone.
Those are the terms of the treaty between us.
But unfortunately, some of the spiders are stupid. Or, perhaps they're just lying little sacks of poo, because they disregard the treaty, and wander into my path. When this happens, I have no choice: They have to die.
The cats are with me on this.
If they HAVE to invade unfriendly territory, the wiser move would be to attack en masse. Twenty million spiders all after you at once? They could do it! They just don't work together well.
That's probably for the best, though.
posted by annekat at
4:30 PM
3 Comments:
Jamie,
As somebody who has worked in a postal-service-related field, I have to say that even the meanest and stringiest spiders are unlikely to enjoy the trip if I mails them to you.
In which case, sure! I will mail them to you!
Yay! Two birds, one stone.
You lurve Monkeys... You don't mean Junstin, do you? He's playful, I guess, but really in a verbal way, and I've NEVER seen him throw feces at any time.
Uh, maybe I just need a nice nap and then I will resume making sense.
By
annekat, at 2:19 AM
But the cats will not be mailing them to you, I don't think. They prefer to "mail" them. To their own esophagi.
By
annekat, at 2:20 AM
The feces throwing is NOT right?
You'd better 'splain that to yer cats then. Unless it's not throwing that they are doing with their poop in the basement.
it's either feces throwing, or some form of cat badminton.
By
Anonymous, at 6:36 AM
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